Invalidated Fear

So, as many people probably already knew, my fears last Thursday night were not justified.  I actually had a really great time and managed to feel, if only for a brief moment like part of the “in-crowd”.  The event was rescheduled to be from 5-7 p.m. instead of 6-8 p.m. as originally planned.  I, of course could not arrive at 5:00 because I had to be at work untill then.  I decided at the last minute to drive to the city instead of taking Bay Area Rapid Transit, or BART, and I ended up arriving a little after 6:00 by the time I got into town and found a place to park. 

The location was a restaurant called Jillians ( which is located at the Metreon complex ( in San Francisco.  So I walked into the restaurant and almost immediately found my friends.  Unsvelt Girl’s husband, whom we call “Majority” (because Marjority rules), is kind of hard to miss, what with the enormous wheel chair and all, but ironically the first person I saw was UGWR’s friend the Tag-Along.  I sat down with them, had a couple glasses of Shiraz and enjoyed the festivities.  When the scheduled event was over, the management essentially kicked us out.  We were, after all, taking up their profit center.

The puprose of this event was to bid farewell to the executive producer of my favorite morning Radio Show, this cutie right here,, who is leaving at the end of his contract, later this month.  Ironically, they decided that day to have one more “going away” party for him, next Thursday.  I believe my friends and I will be attending. 

When the event was over, the male host, “No Name”, and the executive producer, Mattty, decided they wanted to carry the “party” on at another location, Dave’s, located at Third and Market streets.  Matty was standing on the sidewalk outside the Metreon trying to contact his wife on her cell phone.  She was supposed to be taking BART into the city to pick him up and drive his car home but he didn’t want to go home yet.  While Unsvelt Girl and Tag-Along left to go to the restroom, Majority and I stayed on the side walk talking to Matty. 

Initially, Matty was on the left side of an outer doorway, I was on the right side and Majority was across from the door.  Majority and Matty were talking and the subject of Matty’s dog came up.  Matty has a dog, roughly a year old which he named “Kelly Clarkson”.  I asked if they called the dog by her full name and if she actually responded to it.  He said that they do and she loves her name and that Kelly Clarkson is quite famous at the dog park.  About that time, I recalled that Matty hasn’t spoken of his very old cat, which used to be a regular topic of conversation on the morning radio show.

I asked Matty, “I haven’t heard any mention of ‘Colonel Fuzby’ lately.  Is he still around?”


Matty chuckled while crossing over to stand next to me, now standing on my right side.  “That cat,” he said with a grin, “that cat hates Kelly Clarkson.  Colonel Fuzby gets completely ignored now.  He sits in the corner glaring at Kelly Clarkson and cursing her under his breath.  Looks at my wife and me as if to say, ‘Hey!  I’m still here!’


“But the minute we go to bed at night he’s all over me.  The minute my head hits the pillow he’s snuggling up next to me, right here.”  He said patting the top of his left shoulder.  “He starts nuzzling his way into that space as soon as I lie down.  Like…  Well… Like this.”  And with that, Matty leaned in toward me and pressed his left cheek against my arm about halfway up my right bicep.  He then proceeded to rub his way up to the top of my shoulder where he lay his head for a good five seconds.


So ok.  Yeah, I was already kind of horney.  After many months of medicinally induced impotence, I’ve recently begun to… well… regain my mojo.  Now that “things” are starting to work again, I’m kinda like a 16 year old kid, EVERYTHING MAKES ME HORNEY!  So yeah, I was already semi-hard before this happened and it felt reeeeaaalllyyy good to be touched but I didn’t really think he was coming on to me.  An on-line friend of mine insists that’s just what was happening, and had I played along, I just might’ve gotten some that night.  Fortunately, just because I’m gay doesn’t mean I don’t have morals, and a married man is not for me…..  even if….  well… NO!  A married man is not for me. 😀


Anyway, my Friends and I ended up not going to Dave’s that night.  Instead we went to Powell Street and the Cable Car Turnaround where Blondies Pizza is to get a slice.  It was chilly and most of us were discussing other food options, but Majority wanted pizza and, well, like I said, “Majority Rules.”  When that was over, it was time to call it a night.  My friends had taken BART and we parted ways at the Powell Street BART station.  I had to walk five city blocks to my car.  With my inhibitions behind me, I have never before been so acutely aware of the highly attractive male population of the city.  ‘Twas, in a way, a torturous experience and yet delightfully freeing, all at the same time!


In fact I was so horney that night that I did something I couldn’t resist, just for the hell (and the danger) of it.  Before I even backed out of my space in the parking garage I took off all my clothes and drove all the way home (about 25 miles) totaly naked.  There were nearby sidewalks, and rolled down windows involved and much to my amazement (and maybe a little dissappointment) no one seemed to notice.  Not even as I was driving down Market Street.  That of the middle of the road bus stops, putting people on either side of the car!

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