What’s My Next Move?

“Hi.  I’m Jesse.  I’ve been assigned to walk around with you during the fire drills” he said.  He’s a rookie firefighter.  Been on the job for three years.  Can’t be much more than 26-27 years old.  He’s 6’2″ ish with piercing blue eyes the color of the sky.

I work for the Facility Management office of a 25 story high-rise building in the Lake Merritt district of Downtown Oakland, California.  Twice a year we conduct Fire Drills and we always invite a crew from the Fire Department to come and observe.  Douche Bag always assigns a fire fighter to the staff members and today I got Jesse.

In the fourth and final segment of today’s drills I was assigned to the fourth floor for observation where I saw an  old acquaintance of mine searching the floor for stragglers.  Her name is Connee and she’s from Niagara Falls, NY.  I LOVE her.  She’s a sweet little older lady who has always been very nice to me.  After searching and then evacuating the floor we met up in the park across the street where we waited for the announcement that it was time to return to the building.  I was chatting with her when Jesse returned to my side and she asked, “What’s your name Mr. Gorgeous Blue Eyes?”

“Kevin.”  Jesse answered.  “Just kidding.  I’m Jesse.”

Connee laughed.  “Oh I thought you were going to tell me you both had the same name.”

“Wait,” I said.  “Does that mean I have Gorgeous blue eyes, too? —  Never mind.”

“Yep.  That’s what I was saying.” He replied.

Now you see, this is where I fall short as a “newly” gay man.  This guy was cute.  I liked him.  I’d have been interested in talking to him more.  But I never thought he was gay.  Still don’t know that he is.  But here’s what his comment suggests to me.  He thought I had nice eyes.  Had been thinking it all along, and Connee gave him an opportunity to bring it up and see what happens.  But because I’m insecure, and an idiot nothing happened.  I don’t know how to react in a situation like that?

So I’m looking for advice.  What should I have done?  And I’m seriously asking, so no smart ass, “You shoulda jumped on top of him” kind of responses.  How could have I have conveyed to him that I was interested without making the scene crunchy if I had misinterpreted his statement?

What, Mr. Reader, would you have done?

4 Responses

  1. eek i’m a dyke i’d probably give you completely the wrong advice …

  2. I don’t know. Gay is gay right?

    Imagine you were me, and he was a hot firefighter… Come to think of it… he was a hot firefighter… but for your purposes, pretend he wasn’t a he. 🙂

    I wasn’t at all convinced that it was even anything until tonight when I was telling my Therapist about it and she was like, “For future reference when a guy tells you that you have gorgeous eyes…..”

    It’s just that, being new to this whole thing I just don’t know how I should have/could have reacted to this. And I’d hate to miss another opportunity.

  3. well …

    if you’re gonna see him again, you still have time to ask him out or leave him the option to ask you out

    or get his number

    i think your therapist is right 🙂

    i would have just held the eye contact and smiled slowly …

  4. Thanks for the good advice. Honestly, in the moment I didn’t believe it was happening. It seemed like I was surely missing something. It wasn’t till later talking to Deb (therapist) that I realized how obvious it sounded.

    I kinda wish I knew what was in his mind. Was he feeling just as doubtful and insecure as I was? I mean it was a pretty sideways way to make a flirtatious comment. And then what was he thinking when I didn’t respond?

    Sadly, I’m not likely to see him again, so I guess I’ll just have to chalk this one up to experiences/lessons learned.

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