Will You Marry Me?

For as long as I can remember I’ve been a hater of television commercials.  I mean, sure, there were some good ones out there that were worth watching.  I’ve always been kind of partial to the Christmas time Coca-Cola commercials with the CGI Polar Bears.  And there have been plenty of commercials that were clever when they first came out and then just work your last nerve after they’ve been aired a few hundred times.

Green M&M has been really enjoying the M&M commercials of late with the Green M&M playing the sex kitten with the boy M&Ms melting…  Wait–  Green M&M loves the Green M&M…  Hmmmmm….  Go figure.

Anyway, for the most part television commercials have just been an annoyance to me.  I remember being younger and watching TV with Scornful Mother, who always had to have the remote control and when the commercials came on she’d start flipping through the channels.  It always annoyed me because she’d change the channel and then the show we were watching would come back on and she’d be slow to get back to it so when we did come back to it we would have missed part of the show and be lost.  That always bothered me because I don’t watch TV shows just for the sake of filling up time.  I watch them because I enjoy them and I become “invested” in them.  So to take it so lightly and miss parts of the show you actually did set out to watch bothered me.

Eventually, she stopped doing this and began muting the television on the commercials (Why do they have to be so loud anyway?) This was better because at least you could see when the show came back on, but the problem was, she’d mute the TV, put down the remote control and pick up her crossword puzzles.  She wouldn’t always notice the show came back on till I said something and then she had to put down the puzzle and pick up the remote, still dragging on the time when part of the show would be missed.

When I moved out on my own, this was one of the things I most enjoyed was the fact that I had control of the remote and didn’t have to miss out on my TV shows any longer.  Even better though was when I got my first VCR and could record my TV shows and not have to watch the commercials AND not have to wait for them to end.  This was of course only trumped by the acquisition of my first TiVo.

Today I have a DVR with two inputs so I can record two shows at once.  This, of course means I watch more TV shows because I don’t have to chose only one show per time slot.  It also means I have more to watch and always have a little bit of a backlog.  Therefore, I never watch live TV, and I’m always a day behind everyone else.  For the most part I don’t care if I’m behind.  sometimes things get spoiled for me because of it but mostly I don’t care.

All this is to say that I was a day behind the times to watch the series finale of Boston Legal, and thanks to some random blog hopping yesterday, I already found out that Denny Crane and Alan Shore got married.  I was a little caught off guard in reading this.  I have watched this show since the first episode and wile I know that these two characters have had a unique reliationship (referred to on the spoling blog as a “bromance”) and that they have professed their “love” for each other on many occasions, they are not, in fact, gay characters.  So I was prepared to be offended and annoyed by the final episode.

I will say that since my first introduction to David E Kelley in 1997 with Ally McBeal and The Practice I  have been impressed with his work and really enjoyed most of his shows.  He’s very creative and his shows are often topical.  What I’ve noticed however is that he may be cutting off his own nose to spite his face when it comes to writing about political issues during election years.  It seems like more than once one of his shows has been cancelled during a major election season.  I don’t know if Mr. Kelley would say it’s worth it to get out whatever message he’s trying to convey, or if it would be called a coincidence or what, but personally, I would have liked for some of his shows to last longer than they have even if it meant he had to tone down the messages during the times that the American People are at their most sensitive.

That being said, when I found out that Denny and Alan were going to get married on the series finale I was prepared to find the entire thing offensive.  Denny Crane is nothing if not a caricature of a real human being, and I was afraid it would turn out to be some sort of jab at those of us who are outraged at the passage of Proposition 8 in California.  And so, I was very pleasantly surprised to find that the motivation behind Denny’s marriage proposal in the episode was because he didn’t want to die alone.  He didn’t want to deteriorate into dementia (Denny was in early stages of Alzheimer’s disease) without someone he loved and trusted by his side to see him through it.  Alan had long since committed to Denny to be there for him and to look after him.  And when Alan announced his desire to do some thing more philanthropic with his life Denny was only too happy to commit his considerable wealth to the cause (something that heretofore has been completely out of character for Denny.)  He wished to grant his money to Alan and his philanthropy in its entirety, instead of having a considerable portion taken away by a government that has proven it can’t handle the money effectively, through either gift or inheritance taxes.

What I feared would be an insult to the justice that is marriage equality, in fact, turned out to be an excellent argument in its favor.  The scene in the court room when the gay attorney is trying to get an injunction to prevent our heroes from marrying was an excellent commentary on the state of affairs in this country, and a great juxtaposition of the generally proffered argument against same-sex marriage.

Mr, Kelley, I offer my apologies for doubting your intentions.  Certainly I should have known better.  And I offer my gratitude for another job well done.  I look forward to our next meeting in the airwaves and in the interim — Denny Crane!

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