Bait and Switch

Something has just occurred to me.  About six weeks ago, I wrote a series of posts about the renovation of my formerly regrettably pink bathroom.  These posts were a hodgepodge of details about the actual “transformation” or renovation that was taking place in my bathroom at my home.

During the majority of the project my shower was out of commission and I was having to used the shower in the basement of my office building of which I have the fortune (misfortune?) of working in the property management office and have, therefor, free reign over/access to the shower in question.

Now, I’m a dude, which should say enough, right there, but I’m also Gay, relatively new to the acceptance thereof, and a “gay virgin”.  Translation, I’m horny most of the time.  Using this shower in the basement of my office building was, at least the first few times, a sexually arousing proposition for me.  It is a private shower, in a locked room so it wasn’t that exciting, but it provided some opportunities to fantasize and masturbate.    These experiences provided fodder for the blog and while I was writing about the remodel of my bathroom I was also writing about these experiences which means my tags for these posts were things like, “Male Nude, Nude Male, Gay Sex, Fantasy, Fantasizing, Masturbate, etc.”

To this day, when I look at my blog stats, those “Bathroom Transformation” posts are heavily hit.  And when I look at the terms that lead people to my blog on those same days, it’s usually things like “Male Nude, Nude Male, Gay Sex, Fantasy, Fantasizing, Masturbate, etc.”

So today I was looking at my blog stats – I guess I have a secret fantasy to become a popular blog… ist?  Is Bloggist a word? and so I watch my stats closely – and suddenly I had this mental image:

I’m sitting at home in my chair, feet up, naked, looking for some “inspirational material”.  So I log onto WordPress and I do a search for “Male Nude”.  Surely I’ll at least get some nice pictures to look at right?  Maybe I’m in a certain kinda mood, looking for a certain kinda something when I see it.  “Bathroom Transformation, Day 6”.  Maybe this is what I want to see.  Maybe I like a little raunch, or a little water sports, or a little…  Whatever someone might be looking for, and interested in when they see “Male Nude” and “Bathroom Transformation” in the same context.

So I click on the link.  Maybe I’m already a little excited.  Maybe I’m partially hard and I’m already oozing.  Maybe I’ve already got my dick in my hand and I’m ready to go.  And there at the bottom of the screen I see the very top of a picture.  Let me scroll down to that!  Wait! What the–!  It’s a- A BATHROOM.  What the hell kinda smut is this guy writing.  Oh shit.  This post is about renovating a bathroom.

The son of a bitch pulled a bait and switch on me!

But at least I helped him boost his numbers for today!

And if nothing else?  For that, I thank you!  Oh, and, did I mention…  I gotcha again!

Bathroom Transformation Day Nine

Nine days down, one day to go.  Today finds the tile in, the walls painted, the vanity in position and the basin and counter in place, the faucet installed (though not yet functioning), and the lighting fixture in place.  Take a look:

Tomorrow is supposed to be the last day of the main project:  The sink gets plumbed in.  The fixures (i.e. towel rods, toilet paper dispenser, etc.) get installed.  The mirror and storage cupboard get hung.  I hope the door, door frame, window frame and shutters get painted, and the door rehung.  And there’s still a few baseboard tiles to get grout.  Friday Adorable Little Contractor is off to Oregon.  I still don’t have a shower curtain rod, or a makeshift shower curtain.

Wheeler Dealer Land Lady was referred to a showroom where she should be able to find an existing shower curtain rod.  But apparently, it won’t be installed until Monday, September 15th.  So I’m looking at over a week of using the trickle at the office.  The charm has definitely worn off…  Not that I didn’t get myself a good wank in their anyway, but the new has worn off and without some company, it’s just not what it could be.  Today I revisited the Fantastical Engineer services me and my undercarriage while I rub one out on his shiny bald head fantasy.  I need to come up with something new…

Anyway, someone from a company called “Mr. Bathtub” is coming on Saturday, September 13, 2008 to “redo” my bathtub.  I don’t really know what that means, I just know that my bath tub is supposed to be shiny and pristine and new looking so it will fit in with the rest of the newly redone bathroom!

Adorable Little Contract comes back on September 15th to hang the shower curtain rod, grout the gap between the tub and the tile and resolve any open items that haven’t been solved.

It’s kind of funny, but there’s a part of me that is sad that it’s ending.  Scared kitty will be glad it’s over as he has been spending his days locked up in the kitchen with no soft furniture to sleep on and where it gets somewhat steamy.  But I can’t have him roaming free while ALC is trying to do his work and often needs to leave the front door open.  I admit that I expected to see more of ALC.  I got the impression from him at the beginning of this endeavor that he’d be working long days and that I’d see him, probably before I left for work and almost certainly when I got home.  In a strange way, when this first started, I almost felt like I had a husband to come home too (and I could certainly have done worse.)  I expected more discussions about schedules and when we’d see each other and the like.  I guess, truthfully I’m grateful that we didn’t interact more, since his presence is a disruption for me, but I hoped for more contact.

The more I think about it, the more I think he very well might be a Friend of Dorothy.  I recall that his use of pronouns (In his limited discussion about himself) never went beyond “we”.  He never talked about “she” or “my wife” or “my girlfriend”.  Though, admittedly he also never talked about a boyfriend or husband.  It has been extremely hot these last two weeks and I don’t have air conditioning which means that it’s been quite hot in my house while he works.  I’ve seen him in shorts twice now – he has great calves – and he seems not to have much (if any) hair on his legs either.  He’s as “average white” as I am so it’s not like he’s likely of a heritage that doesn’t grow much body hair.  I do believe he’s blond (he always wears a baseball hat) but not super light to where his body hair should be unnoticeable… Of course I realize there are all kinds of simple explanations for this that don’t make him gay, but then again, maybe he is…  He has a great little ass and small waist too!

Tonight, as I was gathering the ingredients for my dinner, my front door open but outer gate closed and locked and with me wearing no clothes, I daydreamed/fantasized about him coming back to the house to do more work and letting himself in never expecting to find me naked.  My fantasy didn’t go beyond the awkward…

ALC: Oh!  I’m sorry, I didn’t realize…

Me: Oh my God.  I didn’t’ think…  I’m sorry…  I’ll just go put some clothes on…  Unless…  Well, unless you like what you see, in which case I won’t… ‘Cause I’ve been thoroughly enjoying what I’ve been seeing…

The fantacy didn’t go beyond that point, but wouldn’t it have been nice…